Fire

“You are not stressed because you are doing too much. You are stressed because you are doing too little of what makes you feel most alive.”

“If you don’t know what to pursue in life right now, pursue yourself. Pursue becoming the healthiest, happiest, most healed, most present, most confident version of yourself. Then the right path will reveal itself.”
@projecthappiness_org

Someone special to me told me today that I will ‘find my fire again’. I’ve lost the fuel to keep my embers burning.
What is the point? Obviously, the point is to love-always, but why am I so focused on ambitions that I need to continuously move forward? Can I just be content in now?

The problem with being content in now is that I’m discontent in the circumstances that I have no control over.
Did I choose to work with horrendous people that move through the world with the sole desire to stamp out all forms of light? No.
Did I know these were the people I would have to encounter day-in and day-out? No.
I did not choose this. So how do I change my circumstances (AGAIN) if I am unable to keep my fire burning where I am?
Do I really need to rebuild the pyre again? I’m just so exhausted. How many times do I need to rehabilitate my life in order to find the right match that won’t continuously burn out and be snuffed into ash?

They (the collective they-whose authority I still question) say that it doesn’t matter how many times you fall, but how many times you continue to rise from the ashes ((Rocky?? Phoenix??)); they failed to mention that getting back up guarantees that one day you would stop getting pushed into the ground.
Courage is a funny thing and confidence is fleeting. One single moment can change everything- I will continue to search for my own personal lighter fluid, but I can’t continue down the same barren road I’ve been taking. I have to continue to search for the light that feeds my soul. Even if I don’t know where I’m going, I can’t continue down the same roads I’ve been and expecting a different outcome.
I pushed and continued to hope and persevere through the darkness, but sometimes the darkness can lead to a new path- have the courage to take it.

Adaptation is a commendable attribute, but not when the goal of life is evolution.